He’s just not that into you…

Ten things a guy will say or do to you that you should not ignore. (Taken from The Book of Donna and Lessons Learned)

1. I don’t make plans.

This is a big one. Don’t ignore it. Because what it really means is he doesn’t want to make plans with you in case something better comes up. Then he can say you never had plans and he doesn’t have to feel like the jerk he really is.

2. I didn’t mean to make you feel bad.

What? There is never, ever justification for saying something you know will hurt someone you love. You might say you didn’t mean it, but you did. If you truly cared about someone’s feelings it wouldn’t even have occurred to you to say something that would hurt them. Own it, stop being a jerk and don’t do it again.

3. I couldn’t get away.

Bullshit. You didn’t want to leave. Instead of being a grown man, you decided to not text or call and pretend that there was no choice. Total Bullshit.

4. I can’t make you feel anything…

What the actual fuck does this even mean? Yes we should all take responsibility for our emotions and reactions, but you can make someone feel like a piece of shit. You can make them feel sad and insecure. When you are in a relationship with someone, what you say to them and how you treat them is a thing. Hopefully as women we just don’t let it drag on and kick his ass out shortly after that happens more than once.

5. I never said I love you because you should have just known I did.

Again, total bullshit. When a man tells everyone in his life he loves them except you, he doesn’t fucking love you. He is biding his time until something better comes along or the gravy train runs the fuck out. Kick it to the curb.

6. I didn’t think you’d mind.

How about just asking me if I do…then you’ll be sure that I don’t.

7. It wasn’t my fault, I had no choice.

Yes you did bonehead. Stop talking.

8. If he ghosts you for a substantial amount of time, for any reason. Ever.

Unless someone has lost an eye, lost their phone in the ocean or died. These are the only acceptable excuses for being ignored. Walk away from that. Right now.

9. If they never say sorry for anything, ever.

Narcissist. Run. The. Fuck. Away.

10. I didn’t see this coming.

Really dumbass? It’s been in plain sight for months. I have said the words. It’s been a conversation. The fact that you didn’t see it coming can only mean that you haven’t heard anything I have said. Points off and see ya later.

I could probably go on and on, but let’s keep it short and sweet like you should if any of the above apply…

Choose you, choose happy. Don’t feel bad about it.

3 thoughts on “He’s just not that into you…

  1. I like the list, it’s a great idea to give some thought to who is and isn’t working out. Especially important to see the warning signs. I have some thoughts on the few that I disagreed with, but will lead with the key one I do agree with:

    1. Him: I don’t make plans.
    YES! Ding-ding-ding. Any guy who comes up with this shit is saying you are not important to him.

    2. Him: I didn’t mean to make you feel bad.
    If someone really didn’t know it would hurt, don’t hang him out to dry. How he responds to discovering it hurt is more important. Does he learn from it? Was it intended to mean something other than than the way you took it? Not entirely with you on this one.

    OK, so I thought I had more I disagreed with, but I don’t. Just the one, and that’s only in the details.

    Some others to consider:

    11. He doesn’t just like to relax with you.
    If he always wants to be doing something or going somewhere, maybe he’s not comfortable with you, he just needs a buddy to do stuff with. There are times it’s nice to be quiet and not do a lot.

    12. He doesn’t chat idly to you and ask about you.
    If he only wants to tell you his stories and not hear about yours, he’s just not that into you..

    Maybe you had these and other items and decide to keep your list short.

    Sometimes relationships are governed by exclusion – the reason you should not be together with your partner.


    • I agree that if it was an unintended hurt and change is following, then of course he should be forgiven and given some slack. I was more talking about thoughtlessness that shows he doesn’t give a crap about your feelings. :) and your additions are blog worthy! Thanks for the input!

      Liked by 1 person

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