No officer, he didn’t make me cry, you did…

I was getting veggies out of my garden tonight, when there was an insane noise outside my house. And then there was a truck and a boat, stopped. With a flat tire. The noise reminded me of something, and experience I had once had with a boat and trailer. Well it wasn’t just me, but I was a participant in the chaos.

Let me start at the beginning…

Someone who I know and shall remain nameless got a speeding ticket the other day, he was driving behind some dumbass guy that was dragging their ass and as soon as there was a chance to pass, the fool would speed up so he couldn’t pass. He got to four lanes and decided to go for it. Well unluckily for him, there was a cop at the top of the hill, and he got a ticket. Sucky.

So I told him my story, I also told my story to Bill later on, and you know when you just feel like you are totally forgetting part of the story that is important…ya, I did.

Ok, so this is what went down that day…

We had gone on a family boat trip to see my boyfriend at the times sister. She lived in a place called Echo Bay and was the school teacher there.

You can only get there by boat, and from where we lived it was a nearly three hour drive before you even got to the boat trip part. The trip up went uneventfully enough and we had a great visit, the weather was kinda crappy but it was calm on the water when we were on our way there.

On our way home, whole different story. I have been on a few boats in my time when it was rough. I don’t like it, and will try to avoid it at all costs. But I trusted Adam on the boat (he is a tugboat captain and has lived here forever, so he knows what he is doing.) It was a rocky and rough trip back to McNeil. We made it, I was totally green but the kids thought it was fun…yay. Let me also add in here, I was PMSing…which means, I cry. But we will get to that in a bit.

So we are back on land, this is good, it is pouring rain…

We get the boat back on the trailer and get everyone in the truck and loaded up. Did I mention that we had two dogs as well? Blue and Chayse…

So we get on the road, everything is looking good, and off we go!!

We get about 20 minutes down the highway and all of a sudden there is a HUGE really bad noise and the truck makes a weird shaking dragging thing…and then all of a sudden…

I kid you not…

A tire goes past my door into the bush, doing about 60 km an hour.

I look at Adam and say, “well that can’t be good can it?”

It wasn’t.

Once we got stopped and off the road and access the situation, we are indeed down a tire on the boat trailer. All the lug nuts are missing off of the tire that flew by us.

NOT GOOD…

Adam says to me that I need to go back to McNeil and  get lugnuts…obviously.

He stays with the boat. Why I am still not sure, I mean it wasn’t like anyone was gonna steal it, right? I was totally scared someone was gonna smoke the boat driving down the highway with him in it…don’t ask me why that bothered me so much, I just remember it did.

So back to McNeil I go, kids and dogs in tow to get new lugnuts…

Timewise we are now behind schedule by about an hour and a bit…I am tired, it is pouring rain, I have PMS, and we have lost a tire…

Have you ever had one of those days? Ya…

Anyways, I get back to the boat. Tire on…other lug nuts checked and tightened. We still don’t know if they were loosened by someone or if they just did that on their own, (a new trailer followed shortly after this trip).

So off we go, everyone relieved to be back on the road.

At the Woss pullout, some old fucker guy pulls out onto the highway in front of us. You know when you think, crap…if only we had been 5 minutes sooner, ya…one of those moments.

And rightly so.

He was a nightmare to drive behind. FOR ABOUT AN HOUR.

Anytime there was a passing lane he would speed up, and with the boat on back the truck couldn’t pass him. FOR AN HOUR…

Needless to say, when we got to the passing lanes near Sayward, I told Adam to just boot it. Go as fast as you have to but get past him.

Sirens…

Police.

CRAP.

I am now not maintaining, at ALL.

The cop comes to the truck and starts to give Adam crap, she says it is pretty irresponsible to be going that fast with a boat on the back and two kids in the truck. We were only about 20 kms over the speed limit, seriously…

CHILL BITCH.

I now lose it. I start to cry. She looks at me, and asks me what is wrong. That of course makes me cry more.

She then decides that Adam needs to get OUT of the truck for a talk. I am not even kidding.

She then comes to my side and asks me if he is being mean to me. I look at her and start crying harder. I try to explain through the blubbering what has happened to us…she is somewhat sympathetic. I tell her I have PMS.

I tell her Adam is a good guy.

It’s not him.

She asks me if I am sure. I say yes.

She then lets me close my door and get back in the truck, talks to Adam for a second and lets him get back in the truck.

She one more time asks me through the window if I am sure everything is ok that he isn’t beating the crap out of me? I swear it isn’t anything he has done.

She then proceeds to say, that it really sounds like we have been through enough for one day, and she is going to let us go with a warning.

Ya think?

I thank her profusely through my tears…I sincerely meant it too. She had no idea.

She also tells Adam to be more responsible and think of his family next time. Never once did he turn me in for being the brainiac behind the idea to pass going obviously too fast…

Good call.

I had PMS…and a cop on my side.

and seriously, you just can’t make this shit up…

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17 thoughts on “No officer, he didn’t make me cry, you did…

  1. Don’t you just hate people who think that they’re the official pace car of the highway or something? I learned to drive in Quebec (and survived 30 years on the roads there) where the Villeneuve family had to go into Formula 1 because they drove too slow for the province’s highways. Now I live in Ontario’s wine country and about half the people I pass flash their high beams at me! What’s with that? I figure they’re angry or shocked that I don’t want to travel at 10 km/h under the speed limit.

  2. I love this title. I feel that way all the time. I’m a crybaby and usually the person who has made me cry thinks our conversation just triggered something deep in my soul. Nope. YOU JUST PISSED ME OFF.

    Also, sorry about your bad trip. You should avoid trips in the future.

  3. Down here in Texas, you would probably be a concelled-n-carry momma. And we men dont ever say anything I mean NEVER say anything that could be taken out of contrext to a woman that is crying. Ya never know. In fact, its best to just bite your lip until it bleeds if you think you should say anything, like You look great in them jeans honey.

    She might have the bloating and well, you never know!.

    Get my drift?

    LOL

  4. I can actually answer the “staying with the boat” thing! Someone would stop and when they found that they couldn’t steal the boat they would have smashed the windows and lite it on fire! That highway is known for it! Must be the if I can’t have it neither can you gene that’s up there! Loved the story thanx for the laughs!

  5. oh girl, this made me laugh hysterically because I’ve so been there! Damn PMS makes me a blubbering idiot over anything stupid little thing that on a normal day I’d just shrug it off and roll with the punches. Being a woman can be such a bitch at times! ;)

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