I am sure your wife would be thrilled…

If she knew what a dog you were.

Or maybe she does and she just overlooks it.

Who knows why…maybe you have more money than God or something. It can’t be because you are smooth, cause I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

And generally dogs aren’t really that good looking. If you are that good looking, you usually aren’t very smart.

So why do smart women stay married to stupid men???

I have been on both sides of the story.

When I was very young, like 18…I had an affair with a married man. It was short, and mostly awkward…he was young too, I honestly don’t remember how old he was at the time.

He wasn’t out looking for an affair, I wasn’t looking for a married man. I approached him in the pub I used to regular frequently at the time, he was straight forward from the beginning and told me he was married with kids, and though he was flattered, he wouldn’t cheat.

I was good with that.

I honestly don’t know how it went from that to an affair. We had crazy chemistry, and we both kept coming back to the pub. Me because I lived there and it was where I hung, and he was working at the mill…so it was something to do on the boring nights. It just happened. Only a couple of times, I am pretty sure he felt as bad about it as I did. So we decided it was best to just stop.

I learned something with the experience, and made a promise to myself I would NEVER do anything like that ever again.

I haven’t. It is a hard and fast rule with me. No exceptions…

I have chased a few married men off in my time.

When I had my store, I had a guy that I brought in to give guitar lessons. The married man I am going to talk about, came into the store to see who the teacher was, as he taught as well. We talked, and apparently he fell in love.

I was not interested at all, married or not. He seemed like a nice enough guy, but he was far from someone I would date, and at the time I too was in a relationship.

When he found out that I was single a few years later, and working at the garden centre, he started to be a pain in the ass. He would come into the store three or four times a week, and wait for me to be free. He wouldn’t let anyone else help him.

Now back then my rudeness level was a little lower than it is now, I didn’t want to be a total bitch and tell him to fuck right off…but he was starting to get more than annoying.

At one point he came in and told me that his wife was in Europe with the kids, and I should come over for a hot tub…

What?? Really???

I said to him “so you are gonna tell your wife that you had a strange girl in your hottub and your house are you??”

Of course he told me they were having marital problems and they were only together because of the kids…did I mention that one of the kids is extremely handicapped, and his wife works her ASS off to raise all of their kids?? I believe there are three…

I said to him at that point…

“You need to back up, and I am not interested AT ALL in this situation. Go home to your wife, and put as much effort into fixing whatever is wrong at home as you are into chasing someone you are never going to get.”

He seemed to get it, and I have only seen him randomly a few times since then…

Dumbass…

I have also been on the other side of the cheating, it was the reason my marriage ended…but that is a story I won’t get into, it is long and boring and I don’t feel like it. My ex husband was a flirtatious DOG, that made me feel like shit fairly regularly as he flirted right in front of me.

No subtly, no remorse, just all dog.

I have zero tolerance for behavior like that now. Zero.

I deserve better, or I will be alone, period.

I am a  flirt, owned. But I would NEVER flirt in front of my man, or even when he wasn’t there, to the point where there would be any question of my motives.

I like to think this is called having some integrity…

So to all the men out there, that think that if your wife is around the corner it is ok to look us girls up and down and flirt like there is no tomorrow, until she comes back around the corner again…it’s not really ok.

We don’t think it is cute, or sexy, or even a little bit flattering. We just think that you are a big ole dog…

Get it?

If only you did…

I just think it’s a little sad that some of the girls you smooze on might actually fall for your shenanigans…well for a minute or two anyways.

Till you get busted, or shot down, it is inevitable one of the two is gonna happen smart ass, so why not just be a good guy and be happy with who you chose to spend the rest of your life with, either that or leave her, cause then, you might not look like so much of a Chihuahua, ya you know, the yappy ones, that you just want to kick in the ass so they shut up?

You didn’t really think it was gonna be something cool like a Pitbull did you?

Cause ya…no. I really mean no offense to the little dogs of the world here either…I needed a comparison is all, and I know that you know what I mean.

So boys, behave yourselves, and just be the great guy that lives deep down inside you, when you are not trying to be all macho and stupid to try and impress us…it will get you way further ahead in life, and you will be able to look at yourself in the mirror and be proud of the man you are, instead of trying to convince us of it…

That is way sexier…just sayin’.

Peace ♥ Out…

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12 thoughts on “I am sure your wife would be thrilled…

  1. Married people, especially guys, seem to have moments when they forget why they got married in the first place. They just need a good slap upside the head! I love your fiesty attitude.

  2. I know this guy that has never let his wedding ring stop him. He disgusts me. He knows it. To him, I’m a bitch. I can’t be sure, but maybe it’s because I told him to his face that I will never lie for him, and if he ever steps out of line in front of me, I will tell his wife.

  3. i have a saying about men: until they are 60 years old they are children and after they turn 60 they are senile…a men ‘s universe is ruled by different standards and their standards are set by their penis. enough said :d

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