Camping crazy

Well, it’s been a hot minute since I posted anything or more like maybe hot years, but for some reason, the universe has decided that possibly I need to start blogging again or at least write when crazy shit happens.

So here we are, because crazy.

If you follow me on Instagram or Facebook, you know that I’m a pretty avid camper, I camp more than pretty much anybody I know, except this year. This year I have now been a grand total of two times. Sometimes life just gets in the way and you don’t get to do the fun stuff as much as you want. Which brings me to this weekend.

I also sort of have a rule to not camp on the long weekends because there’s just too many people and I just don’t. This weekend I took four days off and I thought what the heck I’m going for it. I got lucky on Friday morning and found a spot in my usual campsite in Roberts Creek. It’s my favourite spot in the whole campsite and I was super stoked to have four whole days to camp.

Two campsites down from where I am there is an old very moldy, smelling motorhome, parked with a couple of motorcycles that are actually parked in the campsite. I drove by and wondered what the heck is going on there? Most people park their motorhome in the campsite on flat ground so they’re not sleeping on a hill. This was not the case in this situation.

So that night I go to bed at about 9:30 and I’m watching a movie on my computer when I hear someone talking on the phone. I turned my computer off and it sounds like the person is standing in my campsite, my outside light on the camper goes bright when somebody stands in the line of it, I am like what the actual hell??? At this point I look out the window and there is a guy walking out of my campsite. I double check where my bear spray is, open the door and I was ready confront the guy and say what are you doing in my campsite, but he was long gone. I don’t think this had anything to do with the gentleman in the motorhome by the way, it was just another weird ass thing to make me go hmmm… I mean if you’re checking out someone’s campsite to rip things off, first off you’re in the wrong campsite because I don’t leave anything out and second off get off your phone so the person doesn’t effing hear you….

The Police showed up and there were three police cars with five policeman, it took them about half an hour to get him out of the motorhome. They were pulling things out of the motorhome and throwing it on the ground, I’m assuming to try and get at him, but he was on the bunk on top of the motorhome, and had apparently kicked out one of the windows with his barefoot with a cop standing with a taser ready to go right under the window. He eventually gave up and just came out the door, they handcuffed him and off they went.

I have pictures of all the garbage that the police pulled out of the motorhome trying to get him out which by the way they just left on the ground with the door wide open. I was going to be a good Samaritan and go and close the door, but there was so many flies flying around all the garbage, and the smell was more than I could handle even from the road that I just couldn’t do it. The neighbour down the road drove by and he jumped out and did it on his way by. The man has more balls than I do obviously.

At this point, I’m thinking cool. I’m gonna have a quiet day. There’s not gonna be any more crazy and maybe I can just enjoy the rest of my time here. It was quiet for about three hours and then he came back.

He seemed to be fairly calm at first, and I thought maybe he had just needed to be back on his meds or something, I mean, why would they let him out in the state he had gone in… but sure enough about four hours later he was what I believed to be crying like I’ve never heard a man cry before. I don’t even understand how he could’ve been let out being in that state of mind. But at this point, I’m just done…

I packed up my stuff and came home… a bizarre end to a bizarre weekend. I’m sad that things have come to the point in our world where they let someone out who needs help in a really obvious situation and doesn’t get it.

I’m sad that I got ripped off a day camping. But also I have now reinforced the fact that camping on a long weekend is a really bad idea…

Dirt Burgers…

This weekend is the first trip out with the new trailer, and no, I haven’t named her yet. Just let me say first off, new level of happiness. So much more room in every direction. It was a game changing decision and I am super happy!!!

I am still getting used to towing a little bigger trailer, but it’s way easier to back up than the other one was. Speaking of which, the baby trailer is for sale if you are interested. Which you might not be once I tell the backup story from Wednesday when I was trying to get ready to come camping.

Let’s start at the beginning. I was heading home from Sechelt on Wednesday and thought, hmmm, I should drive through campsite and see what’s up. In doing so there were at least 6 spots open, all of which, but one, that I have camped in before and were all decent spots. My regular spot was open, so I of course gravitated there first. While I was standing in the site, I felt like I needed a change, a bigger spot. So I basically walked from campsite to campsite for probably over half an hour trying to make up my freaking mind. Eventually, I decided on the biggest spot which I’ve camped in before and really liked. (It has a hill and two trees so I was a little chicken to back in the baby trailer)…Also, my kid and his girl are coming this weekend so if we can’t find another spot, there is room for them to pitch their tent. Finally making my decision I headed home.

The small trailer was out on the boulevard for sale and I figured since I’m going to be gone for the weekend I didn’t want to leave it on the road. So I decided I was going to be really brave and try back in my driveway. Optimistic yes. There is a fence, a hedge and many other obstacles that make this more difficult than it needs to be. The fact that the small trailer jack knives on a whim whenever it feels like it doesn’t help. It took me 15 to 20 minutes to finally back into the driveway. There was some swearing and almost crying, but I finally just buckle down and freaking do it.

After I taken a few minutes to calm the fuck down, I start getting everything ready to go. I had no idea I was actually going camping on Wednesday so I wasn’t ready on a total level. 50% yes 50% no … I had to work on Thursday so I figured I didn’t need a cooler or much food. So I took one of my frozen hamburger patties and a bun with some cheese for my dinner. I get the trailer hooked up without any major incidents get to the campsite back up the small hill with two trees also without incident and get settled into the campsite. At about 7:30 I decided I better eat something.

I get the barbeque going and cook my hamburger to perfection…once it was cooked I thought, I will just throw the bun on the barbecue for a second to get it crispy….as I was doing that, I was also taking the hamburger off the barbeque with a far too small spatula and pretty much immediately dropped it into the dirt. Did I mention this was the only food I had because I hadn’t packed anything else? So yup, you guessed it, I’m camping right? Five second rule. I picked it up dusted it off and ate that bitch. It was delicious, I was also starving. And you can’t make this shit up.

Since then everything has been pretty chill, except for the bear stealing the motorcycle guys food in the next campsite. Apparently it’s a Momma and two babies. Another reason having a trailer is gooood.

Here’s to our last summer blitz! Happy long weekend everyone!

Donna=0 Rodent Asshole=3

I hate killing things. I feel bad for days after. Except flies. No one cares about flies. Unfortunately this week, I have bigger mice to fry.

A few weeks ago I took some tarps from one place to the other, two separate times and in between places, they stayed in the back of my truck and under my closed tonneau cover.

You already know exactly where this is going right?

So a few days later, I go camping. I always keep my snacks (well most of them) in a bin in the back of truck with the cooler. It’s perfect because the tailgate is a table and everything locks up at night. The first morning when I woke up, I was super thankful that the torrential rain from the day before (when I was setting up) was over and it was sunny!

As I pull out my bin I see teenie tiny poops on the lid. COME ON….Immediately thinking of the tarps and the mouse we saw running out of the one tarp that I didn’t take in the truck. And then my brain tried to back out of the obvious and I just tried to talk myself into the mouse sneaking in because I didn’t put the cover down as tight as it should have been.

Whatever. I was wrong.

This little shit is living between my bed liner and the truck. It has been camping with me three times, to work, and all over the coast for a month now. He has shit on my stuff, eaten my paper towel, and chewed a hole in Sophie’s treat bag. I’m done with the little freeloader.

So I get a mousetrap from my dad, after the frustrating 20 minutes that follow the peanut butter application, I finally get it set up.

In the morning I have the usual trepidation of knowing that me, and only me, just killed that poor little mouse. I go outside, throw down the tailgate and I will be damned, trap still set. Food nowhere to be seen.

Mouse = 1

I decide I need a brand new trap, they are cheap and I totally don’t know what I’m doing. I buy two. Why not go in guns blazing, make the little nibbler decide what his last meal is gonna be. Choices are good, cheese…or peanut butter with a piece of cat food as icing?

Pick one sucker. He does. And he eats it all. And leaves me a crap as a thank you.

Mouse = 2

I barely touch the trap to take it out, and it snaps like an alligator. What. the. fuck.

Mouse = 3

Now I am gonna be pissed in the morning if I go out and there is no mouse. Now I am a monster. I just want it dead. This is war.

Today at work I buy another mouse trap, a plastic trap that snaps like a shark. I smother that new trap with delicious crunchy peanut butter and a delicious cat kibble. I’m gonna be pissed if it gets past this one, but I will keep trying, his luck has to run out sometime right?

And we wait…updates will be posted! Stay tuned …