Mercury Retrograde…

Let’s just start by saying fuck you Mercury Retrograde.

For me it means that everything will be a challenge, mostly electronic. And by that I mean that absolutely everything I own that plugs in or keeps me connected to said world will either blow up, break down, do whatever the fuck it wants, make me cry and more than likely, just not bloody work for the whole period of retrograde.

I know, many of you are saying…whatever. Maybe you are just a dumb ass that is technically challenged. Well you wouldn’t be wrong, because when the planets align this way…that is the feeling. But seriously…I am getting old. I have lived this three times a year since forever. I just notice it more now because we have more devices that our faces are stuck into.

And I’m getting old.

My patience for shit that takes too long is very, very short. My patience for things that don’t work usually ends with me throwing whatever that thing is…away.

I am trying to teach myself to just put it down, walk away, get right drunk, and come back to it when I have calmed the fuck down.

Some days, that is so much harder that it should be.

Some days, that just doesn’t happen at all. The walking away I mean. In this world of hit delete. I am a button pushing psychopath. I just want all of the things that aren’t working to go away. Delete.

Ha! There have been other times in life when that skill has actually come in fairly handy. When you get mad enough to lose attachment to said object or sometimes person, the delete button is actually a pretty huge relief. Walking away needs to be practiced a lot before you can get good at it.

Thankfully this month, the only thing that I want to go away is the technical challenge. Or for someone to buy me a new computer so that I can blog without shit freezing up, randomly shutting off, or just plain misbehaving.

NO wait. Mercury Retrograde is a bad time to buy stuff. Never mind. I will just take on the challenge of growing my patience for the next while using this beat up old HP puter… it gets the job done eventually. That is part of the whole gig anyway right?

Learn to slow the fuck down. Enjoy every moment. Even if it is a moment you will never get back fighting your computer.

Oh and don’t forget the missing appointments. That might be because I am old. And now getting forgetful. Even when I write that shit down on the Calendar. For this month we are calling it because of Retrograde. Next month I will think of a different excuse.

So here is to spring finally peeking out from under the damn snow and making it through the first part of spring unscathed and hopefully still in the proud possession of a piece of crap computer that hasn’t been run over by my Mustang.

Happy March!!

Cannabis Chocolate Chip Cookies

Prep Time 15 minutes

Cook Time 8-10 minutes

Servings 48-52 cookies

Author I Heart Eating

I want to give credit to the original author and baker. I have changed a few things in the recipe for my Cannabis cookies. But her recipe is the best cookie recipe I have tried for chocolate chip!!!

Ingredients

• 3 cups all-purpose flour
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• 1 teaspoon pink Himalayan salt
• 1/2 cup Cannabis infused butter 
• 1/2 cup Crisco Golden shortening
• 1 cup brown sugar packed
• 2/3 cup granulated sugar
• 2 large eggs
• 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
• 10 ounce package chocolate chips

Instructions

1. In a small bowl, whisk together flour, baking soda, and salt. Set aside.
2. In a large bowl, beat together butter and shortening until combined.
3. Add the sugars, and beat together for 4-5 minutes on high, until well combined.
4. Add eggs, one at a time, add vanilla and until well mixed.
5. Mix in flour until just combined.
6. Add chocolate chips, and mix on low.
7. At this point you can refrigerate the dough to make it a little stiffer or freeze the dough (to use for another day). I have had good luck without this step, because I’m impatient…
8. Preheat oven to 375, and line 2 baking sheets with parchment paper.
9. Drop dough onto pan with a tablespoon and gently shape cookies.
10. Bake for about 8-10 minutes, or until very lightly browned at the edges.

Remove from oven, and let cool on baking sheet or cookie rack.

I use these cookies to help me sleep, I eat one and I am ready for bed in half an hour and sleep through the night like a tired puppy dog.

So not recommended if you want to party 🎈.

Roast Beef Taquitos

I made these tonight and they are definitely worthy of a blog post…Taquitos are one of the things in my life that I can never, ever eat without burning my tongue. Because I’m super cool like that.

So let’s get this happening before I forget what I did…

2 cups Leftover Roast Beef

Flour tortillas

1 cup thinly sliced mushrooms

1/2 thinly sliced onion

2 Pepperoncini pepper

1 tsp cumin

1 tsp chili pepper

1 tsp paprika

1 tsp oregano

2 tbsp Olive Oil

1 tbsp Worcestershire sauce

1 tsp hot sauce

4 ounce cream cheese (1/2 pkg)

3 tbsp mayo

1 cup Grated white cheese

In a large frying pan add oil, onion, mushrooms and pepper, cook until translucent and ready to eat. Add meat and all spices, Worcestershire and hot sauce to hot mixture along with cream cheese and mayo. Mix well. Line a large cookie sheet with parchment paper and preheat oven to 425 degrees.

Place three tbsps of meat mixture and sprinkle with grated cheese on one edge of tortilla, roll tightly. Place on parchment papered tray. Repeat until all Taquitos are rolled, use a brush and brush the rolls generously with olive oil. Sprinkle with coarse salt. (Don’t skip this…its delicious.) Bake Taquitos for 15-20 minutes.

Devour.